Awakward 101

Just a few tidbits of facts/events which have happened to me lately….

Usually I’m a pretty good neighbor. If you’re loud and it’s the weekend I do not say a word. If it’s Saturday night and your drunk ass falls into my front door at 3 am, I just peek out to make sure you’re not dead. Basically I never, ever complain. Over the past few months my neighbor w/ whom I share a living room wall must have gone deaf. Most nights, usually pretty late ie. after 12 am. he likes to watch movies at ear piercing decibels. I’ve said something to my manager once and she told me if I “officially” complained they would have to note it in his record. Ok really it wasn’t that big of a deal. I’m awake at those hours too and though it’s annoying trying to hear my TV over his, it’s not that bad. Not last night. At 1 am. I am in my bed, trying to go to sleep and it’s like i”m watching The Dark Knight with the guy. After trying to sleep for 20 min I get up, while in my PJs, knock on his door. Not once, not twice, but three times I have to pound on it before I get a not-so-friendly gruff, “Who’s there?!” Um your neighbor. “What do you want?!” Um I can hear your movie in my bedroom could you please turn it down? “oh, ok.” Now really, your movie is sooooo loud that i have to band, loudly on your door three times! Get a bell tone man.

For work we officially no longer have an office suite. Yep, when you do a TV pilot and it goes long you lose your office. Well that leaves me to sit all day long in our editing bay with my bosses as they hash out a script and I try to look busy. Like writing this post. Honestly I wish I had more work to do but I don’t and I have no imput on this script because I’ve gone brain dead and no longer care. Yes, this is not good nor will it get me another job but for some reason I cannot muster the energy to care. I digress. Except for that I love my post house. They order you lunch, have a fully stocked kitchen, the Avid’s never crash, the girls bathroom is always clean because they are no girls here. AND today I found out that in said bathroom not only is there mouthwash, lotion, dental floss, free toothbrushes, and air freshner but there are free “female” products. Seriously who’s ever heard of that before?! Now when you’re stuck and do not have that magic quarter you do not have to go out to your male counterparts and ask for it. And you get to go, “Um no two dimes and a nickle will not work. Um why? Umm it just won’t. Don’t ask.” We’ve all been there. We’ve all had to do it but not here!!!

Another good story…..the other day I went and had the really fun bikini wax. Now again, ladies, don’t even try to tell me “it’s not that bad.” Not that bad my ass. I’ve been at this for awhile and shit still hurts. And I’m not a quick recover so those who get this done and then jump right into bed….lord am I jealous of you. My waxing woes are not the story…..while comiserating said woes to a friend she was like wasn’t this a problem when you lived in the midwest? To answer that question, no. Why not? Cause midwest boys do not care as much….she didn’t believe me. It’s not they don’t like the benefits of the wax. Oh no, it’s just that in the midwest most, not all, boys pretty abandon that area except for the main act. Oh yes, it’s all about them. Which not so much fun for the ladies! Oh and then I have to ask who in the hell thought it was a good idea to dry hump women like they were dogs? Seriously this is not a turn on, this does not turn me on, nor does it ever accomplish “the goal”. I hate it! Most women do. Just lettin’ ya know out there. Knock it off! That and jack rabbit sex. Please. 99% of women do not want their vagina pounded so much that the next day it’s bruised. Yes, that’s good time. NO, NO IT”S NOT!

Well there’s some rants for ya….

SUPPO​SEDLY​ if you’​ve seen over 90 movie​s,​ you have no life.​ Mark the ones you’​ve seen.​ There​ are 245 movie​s on this list.​ Copy this list mail,​ go to your own faceb​ook accou​nt,​ paste​ this as a note.​ Then,​ put x’s next to the movie​s you’​ve seen,​ add them up, chang​e the heade​r addin​g your numbe​r,​ and click​ post at the botto​m.​ Have fun!

if you want add comme​ntary​!​

() Rocky​ Horro​r Pictu​re Show
(x) Greas​e
(x) Pirat​es of the Carib​bean
(X) Pirat​es of the Carib​bean 2: Dead Man’​s Chest​
(X) Pirat​es of the Carib​bean 3: At World​’​s End
() Boond​ock Saint​s
(X) Fight​ Club
(X) Stars​ky and Hutch​
(x) Never​endin​g Story​
() Blazi​ng Saddl​es
(X) Airpl​ane
Total​:​ 8

(x) The Princ​ess Bride​
() Ancho​rMan
(x) Napol​eon Dynam​ite
(x) Labyr​inth
() Saw
() Saw II
(X) Saw III
() White​ Noise​
(x) White​ Olean​der
() Anger​ Manag​ement​
(x) 50 First​ Dates​
(x) The Princ​ess Diari​es
(x) The Princ​ess Diari​es 2: Royal​ Engag​ement​
Total​ so far: 16

(x) Screa​m
(X) Screa​m 2
(X) Screa​m 3
(X) Scary​ Movie​
() Scary​ Movie​ 2
() Scary​ Movie​ 3
() Scary​ Movie​ 4
(x) Ameri​can Pie
(x) Ameri​can Pie 2
(x) Ameri​can Weddi​ng
(X) Ameri​can Pie Band Camp
Total​ so far: 25

(x) Harry​ Potte​r 1
(X) Harry​ Potte​r 2
(X) Harry​ Potte​r 3
(X) Harry​ Potte​r 4
(X) Harry​ Potte​r 5
() Resid​ent Evil 1
() Resid​ent Evil 2
(x) The Weddi​ng Singe​r
(x) Littl​e Black​ Book
(X) The Villa​ge
(X) Lilo & Stitc​h
Total​ so far: 34

(x) Findi​ng Nemo
(X) Findi​ng Never​land
(X) Signs​
(x) The Grinc​h
() Texas​ Chain​saw Massa​cre
() Texas​ Chain​saw Massa​cre:​ The Begin​ning
() White​ Chick​s
(x) Butte​rfly Effec​t
(x) 13 Going​ on 30
(X) I, Robot​
() Robot​s
Total​ so far: 41

(x) Dodge​ball:​ A True Under​dog Story​
(X) Unive​rsal Soldi​er
(X) Lemon​y Snick​et:​ A Serie​s Of Unfor​tunat​e Event​s
(x) Along​ Came Polly​
(X) Deep Impac​t
(X) KingP​in
(x) Never​ Been Kisse​d
(x) Meet The Paren​ts
(x) Meet the Focke​rs
() Eight​ Crazy​ Night​s
(x) Joe Dirt
(X) KING KONG
Total​ so far: 52

(x) A Cinde​rella​ Story​
() Anoth​er Cinde​rella​ Story​
() The Termi​nal
(X) The Lizzi​e McGui​re Movie​
(X) Passp​ort to Paris​
(x) Dumb & Dumbe​r
() Dumbe​r & Dumbe​rer
() Final​ Desti​natio​n
() Final​ Desti​natio​n 2
() Final​ Desti​natio​n 3
() Hallo​ween
(X) The Ring
() The Ring 2
(X) Survi​ving X-​MAS
() Flubb​er
Total​ so far:​58

(X) Harol​d & Kumar​ Go To White​ Castl​e
(X) Pract​ical Magic​
(X) Chica​go
() Ghost​ Ship
X() From Hell
(X) Hellb​oy
(X) Secre​t Windo​w
() I Am Sam
(x) The Whole​ Nine Yards​
() The Whole​ Ten Yards​
Total​ so far: 66

(X) The Day After​ Tomor​row
(X) Child​’​s Play
() Seed of Chuck​y
() Bride​ of Chuck​y
(x) Ten Thing​s I Hate About​ You
(x) Just Marri​ed
(X) Gothi​ka
(X) Night​mare on Elm Stree​t
(x) Sixte​en Candl​es
(X) Remem​ber the Titan​s
(X) Coach​ Carte​r
() The Grudg​e
() The Grudg​e 2
(x) The Mask
() Son Of The Mask
Total​ so far: 76

(X) Bad Boys
(X) Bad Boys 2
(x) Joy Ride
() Lucky​ Numbe​r Sleve​n
(x) Ocean​’​s Eleve​n
(x) Ocean​’​s Twelv​e
(X) Ocean​’​s Thirt​een
(X) Bourn​e Ident​ity
(X) Bourn​e Supre​macy
(X) Bourn​e Ultim​atum
() Lone Star
(x) Bedaz​zled
() Preda​tor I
() Preda​tor II
() The Fog
(X) Ice Age
() Ice Age 2: The Meltd​own
() Curio​us Georg​e
Total​ so far: 87

(X) Indep​enden​ce Day
() Cujo
() A Bronx​ Tale
() Darkn​ess Falls​
() Chris​tine
(x) ET
() Child​ren of the Corn
() My Boss’​s Daugh​ter
(x) Maid in Manha​ttan
(X) War of the World​s
(X) Rush Hour
(X) Rush Hour 2
Total​ so far: 93

() Best Bet
(x) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
(x) She’​s All That
(X) Calen​dar Girls​
(X) Sidew​ays
(X) Mars Attac​ks
(X) Event​ Horiz​on
(x) Ever After​
(x) Wizar​d of Oz
(x) Forre​st Gump
() Big Troub​le in Littl​e China​
(X) The Termi​nator​
(X) The Termi​nator​ 2
(X) The Termi​nator​ 3
Total​ so far: 104

(X) X-​Men
(X) X2
(X) X-3
(x) Spide​r-​Man
(X) Spide​r-​Man 2
(X) Spide​r-​Man 3
() Sky High
() Jeepe​rs Creep​ers
() Jeepe​rs Creep​ers 2
(X) Catch​ Me If You Can
(x) The Littl​e Merma​id
(x) Freak​y Frida​y
() Reign​ of Fire
(x) The Skull​s
(x) Cruel​ Inten​tions​
(X) Cruel​ Inten​tions​ 2
() The Hot Chick​
(x) Shrek​
(x) Shrek​ 2
(x) Shrek​ 3
Total​ so far: 119

(x) Swimf​an
(X) Mirac​le on 34th stree​t
(X) Old Schoo​l
(x) The Noteb​ook
() K-​Pax
() Kripp​endor​f’​s Tribe​
(x) A Walk to Remem​ber
() Ice Castl​es
() Booge​yman
(x) The 40-​year-​old-​virgi​n
Total​ so far:​125

(X) Lord of the Rings​ Fello​wship​ of the Ring
(X) Lord of the Rings​ The Two Tower​s
(X) Lord of the Rings​ Retur​n Of the King
(X) India​na Jones​ and the Raide​rs of the Lost Ark
(X) India​na Jones​ and the Templ​e of Doom
(X India​na Jones​ and the Last Crusa​de
Total​ so far: 131

() Basek​etbal​l
() Hoste​l
(X) Waiti​ng for Guffm​an
() House​ of 1000 Corps​es
() Devil​s Rejec​ts
(X) Elf
() Highl​ander​
(X) Mothm​an Proph​ecies​
(X) Ameri​can Histo​ry X
() Three​
Total​ so Far: 135

() The Jacke​t
() Kung Fu Hustl​e
() Shaol​in Socce​r
() Night​ Watch​
(x) Monst​ers Inc.
(x) Titan​ic
(X) Monty​ Pytho​n and the Holy Grail​
() Shaun​ Of the Dead
() Willa​rd
Total​ so far: 138

() High Tensi​on
() Club Dread​
() Hulk
() Dawn Of the Dead
(X) Hook
(X) Chron​icle Of Narni​a The Lion the Witch​ and the Wardr​obe
(x) 28 days later​
() Orgaz​mo
() Phant​asm
(X) Water​world​
Total​ so far: 142

(X) Kill Bill vol 1
(X) Kill Bill vol 2
(X) Morta​l Komba​t
() Wolf Creek​
(X) Kingd​om of Heave​n
(X) the Hills​ Have Eyes
() I Spit on Your Grave​ aka the Day of the Woman​
() The Last House​ on the Left
() Re-​Anima​tor
() Army of Darkn​ess
Total​ so far: 147

(X) Star Wars Ep. I The Phant​om Menac​e
(X) Star Wars Ep. II Attac​k of the Clone​s
(X) Star Wars Ep. III Reven​ge of the Sith
(X) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(X) Star Wars Ep. V The Empir​e Strik​es Back
(X) Star Wars Ep. VI Retur​n of the Jedi
() Ewoks​ Carav​an Of Coura​ge
() Ewoks​ The Battl​e For Endor​
Total​ so far: 153

(X) The Matri​x
(X) The Matri​x Reloa​ded
(X) The Matri​x Revol​ution​s
() Anima​trix
(X) Evil Dead
(X) Evil Dead 2
(X) Team Ameri​ca:​ World​ Polic​e
(X) Red Drago​n
(X) Silen​ce of the Lambs​
(X) Hanni​bal
Total​ so far: 162

Now Add them up and.​.​.​.​.​.​

I’d just like t point out that I was a film major in college and am now paid to watch said well sometimes, “crap” for work. Plus some of these were good and/or great films! How many have you watched?

For the past few years I’ve only come home for the holidays for a week due to work. Each year I feel rushed and that I never am able to spend any time with my parents. This year I thought my job was ending right before the holidays so I booked almost a month at home. Then my job was extended which is great for my bank account but not so much for my trip. I left for home thinking it was going to be ok to work from home; esp. since most of my work is done via. Internet. Yesterday I found out this was not an option.

Here’s where I get annoyed. First my boss has been nonstop bugging me with requests but let it be known that though I was spending a decent amount of time fulfilling his demands I would not be paid unless in LA. Um….that sucks. Next, apparently some CDs have gone missing and my elephant brain has decided to fail me. Not good. Therefore I’m spending $400 to fly back a week early to find said CDs and perform other fun tasks. To be honest, most of the time I will probably be sitting in our cold offices twiddling my thumbs questioning my existence. Really, I might have an hour or two of work a day right now. It’s unbelievably frustrating!

BUT I need another job and soon so being “unreliable” is not an option. I have to be “available” in order to make a good impression in order to be considered for another job. Plus the difference between a week’s pay and the cost of the ticket isn’t horrible. AND I’m trying to be grateful I even have work. Many, and I mean many, of my friends are out of work and it’s not looking like that is going to change anytime soon. Um…recession! Love it! Mainly I’m just sad to have to leave my parents and not finish everything I wanted to accomplish here. I want my other week. I have a feeling I will not be able to have any type of vacation for the next 6 – 8 months which is daunting. Yes, I know normal ppl live those lives but normal ppl do not have to run around trying to find Revolutionary war experts to interview in the next 24 hrs at a battle site (that I only have GPS coordinates to locate it)and then clear said battle site with the National Park Service. Did I mention I booked that and three more impossible shoots in a day. Yes, that’s my average work day. Oh…and did I mention that in the past I have held a cargo plane at LAX so my giant poster comps could get on board so that they arrive in London by 9am the next day? I can get anything anywhere within 12 hrs as long as I have a limitless budget. Yes, these are the job skills you learn in La La Land. Too bad they do not translate into a normal job skills set.

For the past few weeks the studio lot where I work is taping a new television show. I cannot disclose which show or the exact ppl involved in this story but let’s just say it’s a family and the dad is known for his incomprehensible speech and shuffling. Anyways….this past week they were doing rehearsals. First there’s no parking, second I have to trip over their giant equipment trucks every day, third they decided most of the side walk needed to be a red carpet holding area, Fourth the main entrance to my building is the security check point for the studio audience. Now after all this you cannot entire the other two entrances in the building because the hallways go past their dressing rooms.

At this point, I can’t park and cannot walk into my building without being “searched”. Two of the family members dressing rooms are on my floor. Before you get to the dressing rooms you pass by the bathrooms. These bathrooms are the ONLY bathrooms on the floor. Yesterday I took the very long walk to the bathrooms. Sitting at the end of the hallway is your stereotypical security guards. Large wearing a leather jacket, looking bored, on the cell phone type guards. As I walk up, he stops stares at me, starts to get up as I walk past and then he stands and watches as I enter the bathroom. WTF?! Then as I leave the bathroom he watches me leave the area. I mean I get that there are “famous” ppl down the hall but who cares? I work in the entertainment industry so I’ve seen a few “celebrities” and honestly could give a shit. Plus I was wearing my studio badge AND our lot isn’t open to the public. It was ridiculous.

1. last beverage→Diet Coke
2. last phone call→ Mel
3. last instant message→ Jessi
4. last song u listened to→ The Con by Tegan and Sara
5. last time you cried→ last night
6. last text message→ Michelle

SIX HAVE YOU EVER:
1. dated someone twice→ nope once was enough thank you
2. been cheated on? yes
3. kissed someone & regretted it?→ Nope
4. lost someone special?→ Yes
5. been depressed?→ Yes
6. been drunk and threw up? who hasn’t?

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
1. Yellow
2. Pink
3. Green

THIS MONTH HAVE YOU:
1. Made a new friend → Yes
2. Fallen out of love → No
3. Laughed until you cried → Yes
4. Met someone who changed your life → No
5. Found out who your true friends were → No
6. found out someone was talking about you→ No
7. Have you kissed anyone on your friend’s list→ Um on fb this month? No
8. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life → almost all except a few
9. How many kids do you want to have→ none
10. Do you have any pets → sadly no
11. Do you want to change your name → No
12. What did you do for your last birthday→Um had a party at Truckstop….
13. What time did you wake up today → 10:00am
14. What were you doing at midnight last night →Sitting in the F’ing Taco Bell drive thru
15. Name something you CANNOT wait for →my trips to Chicago and Vancouver
16. Last time you saw your father→ May – I really miss him
17. Whats one thing you wish you could change → my love life
19. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom → Is that a real question? – um yes but really?
23. What’s getting on your nerves right now → my PA situation but really it’s not that bad
24. Most visited webpage → gmail

001. Whats your real name → Nope not telling
002. Nicknames→ Koop
003. Status → single
004. Zodiac sign → Scorpio
005. Male or female → Female
006. Elementary –> St. Marks
007. Middle School → St. marks
008. High school → Steeleville
010. Hair color –> blong
011. Long or short → sort of long
015. Are you health freak → NO- I really should be though
016. Height → 5′ 10″
018: what do you like about yourself → I’m smart and pretty funny
019: piercings→ Ears
020. Tattoos → none
021. Righty or lefty → Righty

FIRSTS :
022. First surgery → Kidney biopsy
023. First piercing → ears
026. First sport you joined → Cheerleading – Is that a sport?
027. First pet → Pepper
028. First vacation→ Um….Myrtle Beach
029. First concert → Nelson
030. First crush → Ohh….I think serious crush was Kyle

CURRENTLY :
049. Eating → nothing
050. Drinking → Diet Coke
052. I’m about to → post this
053. Listening to → Dirty Sexy Money.
055. Waiting → Michelle to txt me back about tonight

YOUR FUTURE :
058. Want kids? Nope
059. Want to get married? yea, I guess.
060. Careers in mind? Producer

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX? :
068. Lips or eyes → Eyes
069. Hugs or kisses → hugs
070. Shorter or taller → Taller
071. Older or Younger→ older
072. Romantic or spontaneous → spontaneous
073. Nice stomach or nice arms → stomach
074. Sensitive or loud →a mixture would be best
075. Hook-up or relationship → Relationship
077. Trouble maker or hesitant → more toward the trouble maker

HAVE YOU EVER :
078. Kissed a stranger → Yes
079. Drank hard liquor → Yes
080. Lost glasses/contacts → No
081. Ran away from home → No but I once buried a sock of money in case i wanted to…um I was like 10
084. Broken someone’s heart → Um I think so
085. Been arrested → almost
086. Turned someone down → Yeah
087. Cried when someone died → yes
088. Liked a guy/girl friend → Yes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
089. Yourself → Yes
090. Miracles → Yes
091. Love at first sight → Oh no…..
092. Heaven → Yes
093. Santa Claus → No but I like the idea of ppl acting like Santa and giving to the less fortunate
095. Kiss on the first date → maybe
096. Angels → yes

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY :
097. Is there one person you want to be with right now? yep
098. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? No
099. Do you believe in God? Yes
100. Posting this as 100 Truths? Yeah

Last night it was 11pm and I was finally heading home from work. I really, really wanted pizza and in LA there are no late night pizza places. So I decided to stop at one of those Taco Bell/ Pizza Hut combo restaurants. First I get in line, in the drive thru, and I sit and sit and sit. REally I mean how long does it really take to make a taco? After sitting for almost 20min I make my order only to get to the window and for them to say, “sorry. You’re breadsticks aren’t ready yet. We’ll give you some free nachos if you don’t mind pulling around and wating a few minutes.” Fine. I really wanted my damn pizza.

I pull over and start reading a magazine, not really paying attention to the time. After awhile I realize it’s been almost 20 freakin’ minutes. I look back and the restarurant doors are now locked. WTF?! So I go through the horrendously slow drive thru yet again. After another 10 minutes I get to the window….first the damn breadsticks are still not ready. The very embarassed guy at the window gives me a refund and just my pizza. Um yeah free nachos? Anyone?

After almost an hour at this fun adventure I get home. I finally get to sit down and eat my highly anticipated, sought after pepperoni pizza. Um it was basically cheeseless, burnt, and horrible. Needless to say I was extremely happy I got my money back. Worst pizza I’ve ever had and this includes when I’ve had to mop grease up off the pizza. Moral of the story: F’ drive thrus, especially at 11pm.

On December 20th in cities around the nation people who believe in equal rights will hold candle light vigils. Check out www.jointheimpact.com to find your city. Please remember we are all created equal. Happy Holidays!

Video Here.

I believe every person in any white trash – Esq town needs this for a Christmas/Holiday gift. May I present: The Beer Hoodie! No I’m not making this up. It actually exists and for $45.00 +shipping you too could be “white trash”.

Normally I would never ever post about this but in the last two days I’ve had multiple conversations about my friends and whether we have “game” or no “game”. Personally I believe I fall into the “no game” category but at the same time that might actually be my game. Confused yet? Welcome to my world.

I have a friend and she’s great. She’s funny, witty, cute as shit, and people love to hang around her. She never, ever has a boyfriend. At first you’re like I don’t get it but then you start to see it. She is completely game- less. Girl, walks up to a boy and will like should bump him and is like “Hey man”! Whoa. Even I who has little to any knowledge of such things knows this is not the way to get anyone to like you. I am not a girly girl. I’m really sort of an ass and I make it quite difficult to get to know me. Yes, I’m a boy with really good breasts. But I know that really being “a guy” is not a good thing unless you want said boy to just be your friend. It’s painful ppl. It’s so “friendly” like that I didn’t even know she liked several guys because it was like she went out of her way to make it seem like she was one of the guys. Later I found out that she actually wanted to date a few of them. Oh Lord. Girl needs some help.

Now back to me….like I said I don’t really have game and you want to know why? It’s because I feel stupid batting my eyelashes, giggling, and being all “girly” toward anyone. AND the one thing I’ve always had going for me is the fact that I am not stupid. I am actually quite intelligent and therefore will never do things which make me seem or feel otherwise. Plus I do not want to date you if I need to do those type of gestures to get your interest. Nope. You will never be the person for me. Honestly if you’re not funny, clever, witty, a bit of an ass, and smart then you really need to not be talking to me. I have plenty of sub par ppl in my life and have no need nor want to add anymore. Just to be clear, I’m not being a snob when I say smart. Intelligence comes in many different forms. I happen to be semi-book smart with a lot of common sense and street smarts. People I’ve liked have ranged from being “smart” at film making, lead guitarist, book smart too, semi-pro snowboarder, and well the one that honestly is smarter than me but doesn’t totally believe that. Let’s just say we definitely could match wits and it was a sarcastic, asinine good time. Loved it.

But I digress….I have no game because I don’t want any game and that ladies and gentlemen is exactly my game. Wanna play?

For the past two days I have spent my evenings reading a great new book, Belong to Me by Marisa De Los Santos. I had been wanting to read this novel for quite awhile and finally got my free copy from the public library, but this book I would definitely go spend the money to buy. Honestly I am not such a fan of any literature which doesn’t have a good central story. If I’m not sucked into the world and really care about the characters I am not going to highly enjoy the book. I might like it but I’m not going to crave it which usually causes me to read the entire piece in a sitting or two.

The story is set in a rural suburb of Philadelphia and at first glance I thought was going to revolve around living in a small town and how the new woman adapts to it. Yawn. Been there, done that, hell lived that one. After the first chapter or two you realize that the story isn’t from one person’s point of view but several characters and without noticing it these characters seem to weave themselves together. Each personal story begins to subliminally teach the reader a lesson which sounds painful or awful but I like to think of it as wake up call. I reminder of certain aspects of life we tend to not remember or pay enough attention to each day.

The most profound character is a near genius level 13 yr old kid, Dev. Dev’s one of those people that thinks about everything and takes thoughts into the abstract but without making you feel stupid or him sounding silly. It’s Dev’s thoughts on time that intrigued me. During 7th grade, he was ridiculed by a teacher who obviously was not as smart as Dev. Painfully this year seemed to crawl by for Dev. Each day seemingly becoming longer and more difficult to manage. Sensing his pain, Dav’s mom, Lake tests him and decides to move to this suburb so he can attend a special gifted high school. Dev flourishes there, makes friends, has teachers who listen to him and even meets a girl. Six months later, Dev feels like his old life in CA is like the miles between CA and Philly or years ago. His former life seems so distant he cannot even imagine living it.

I’m sure there’s some name for this feeling that time can slow or speed up. There are days when I look at the calendar thinking it’s October…..Wait, it’s October! In two weeks I will be turning 29. What happened to 28 or 27 or 26? Unlike Dev my life hasn’t improved that much over the years for this time to just fly by. In High school time felt like it stood still but HS was not a pleasant experience for me. I constantly fought the need to be invisible and the need to be shiny, bright, and visible. Not an easy balance beam to maneuver. Which leads me to my other favorite phenomenon to ponder; change.

Many times in my life I could actually feel the moment my life changed; for good. For most some of these moments deal directly with death. Anyone not affected by a loved one’s death I think might need some help. Death doesn’t always change a person in a negative way either. Sometimes it forces us into realizing we need to make other changes in our lives or simply live our life. I used to think ppl were full of crap when they said live your life…um, what else can you do? But it’s so very true. As I got older I kept hearing my mother’s voice as I said, “No I can’t do that trip right now, but in the future I’ll go”. My mom is 58 and this April is finally going to Europe. I desperately didn’t want my life to be the same way. Now I scrounge up money and just go. The experiences I’ve had from traveling will always mean more to me than any pair of shoes or clothing or computer gadget.

But there are other changes; subtle ones. The type where you stop one day, look at yourself in the mirror and think who is this person? Don’t go negative here but this can happen. Without even realizing it your attitude can change, the way you dress, think about the world. Those sneak up on you and usually are a good thing. Sometimes though, change will be forced upon you in a way you’d never expected. A broken heart, loss of a friendship, losing a job, realizing you’re not the person you’d always aspired to be…….these change us forever. Many revolve around people entering and leaving our lives, just like everything else sometimes it’s a good thing to purge an unhealthy relationship from your life. Other times it can be painful. Pain you feel throughout your entire body. Luckily that can heal.