Archive for September, 2008

Ok first just because I’m watching CSI: Miami which yes is not great TV. First what is up w/ Callie Ducane (sp?) lips? Collagen looks bad people just do not do it! She has fake, plumpy gross lips. Second do not try and use Long Beach with it’s obvious crayola crayon street signs as Miami. It’s obviously not Miami. Lord.

With that off my chest….here’s the real post…..

There is a time in our lives, usually after college graduation, where we have to decide what the hell we’re going to do w/ our lives. Now after college this usually means figuring out where you’re going to move and then finding a job. Later it’s picking a partner, getting married, and deciding to have kids. I was unusually lucky because at that time of my life I already knew what I was going to do. Less than two weeks after graduation I packed up my life and moved to LA. I’ve been here every since and always with the same goal to produce feature films.

What exactly am I suppose to do when it’s a little over a month til my 29th birthday and I have no freakin’ clue what to do with my life? This past year has been one giant wake up call and I have no idea what I’m going to do. In less than a week I’m going to be unemployed and I’ve discovered that I have no real world job skills, no useful degree, and really no experience which pertains to any job openings I’m finding. I have little savings, due to my decision to live like a 22 yr old for several months, and in a very short time if I do not find work I’m going to have to decide….do I move home? Oh yes, Southern Illinois. Great place to find work in the entertainment industry. Shoot me. But I am almost 29 and this is when I’m suppose to be able to support myself and not have to call my parents to bail me out. But I have a nice giant rent payment and a new fun $500 cobra health insurance bill each month.

Always save, never live alone, and for fuck’s sake do not get sick! You will be SOL in a very, very short time. Now I can pretty much move anywhere I’d like. I have no real attachments here ie. partner, kids, house. Oh wait there’s my leased car…..yeah there’s a reason to stay. I really don’t like any cities in the United States mostly cause I’m not a huge fan of our country at the moment and I really hate cold weather. So I’m thinking Canada?! OR since I miss my BFF more than anything possibly Chicago. I do have some other friends there but we haven’t seen each other since college graduation so I’m sure they all have their own lives now.

In the end, it sort of sucks being an “adult” and I have no freakin’ clue what I’m going to do.

I know what a weird subject for a post but my bug adventure the other night highly amused me so I thought WTF let’s share it.

Let preface this story by stating that I am from a bug state ie. Illinois. Now I love when people try to tell me about the large roaches in NYC or mosquitoes in the South etc. because our bugs might not be the largest but we have every variety of creepy, crawly, pesky, bug out there. Growing up I have been tormented many, many times by every bug imaginable but I had and still do, a huge aversion to anything that jumps. This includes crickets and especially frogs, which yes I know isn’t a bug, but if I see a frog in the wild I will, not freak out, but steer clear of the slimy, jumping little pest. Keep in mind this particular aversion came after the summer the frogs invaded IL and I kept stepping on them barefoot. Makes my skin crawl just thinking about it.

But back to my story, the other night I came home from working the night shift so it’s about 3am. I’m just chilling watching TV when out of hte corner of my eye I spy something moving. It’s a freakin’ cricket hoping across my carpet. Immediately I jump up and grab a sneaker. Now it’s 3am and I don’t want to get near the thing so picture me, half awake, hopping around trying to throw my sneaker at a cricket and trying to do so without making a sound. Plus I keep missing the lil’ shit keeps trying to dart under my Entertainment center. Not good, not good at all. Thinking I needed to be quicker and I grabbed 3 other sneakers. Armed w/ ammo, I aimed at the thing but now it’s hoping toward the balcony door. New goal; get the creepy thing to jump out the door and then slam it shut. Yes, I went all PETA on the thing.

Well….PETA will be revoking my card cause that didn’t work at all. Finally I hit it with a sneaker but it only stunned the nasty thing. I aimed again and this time hit it with one shoe and then used another to add weight to really squash it.

This all happened um…last week Thursday. Yesterday I needed to wear the sneakers which were still killing the bug. So standing far away, cause ya know it could still be alive, I grabbed them only to discover the cricket had dried to my shoe. Squealing like a girl, um no judgements, I bolted to the bathroom where I had to scrap the bug into the toilet and it fell off in parts. GROSS!!!!

Needless to say…..ok I’ve got nothing just laugh at me w/ the tiny cricket acting like it was a cobra or something.

A few months ago I posted a list of books I had read and was going to read. Well I’m still reading like a mad woman and decided to update my previous list. Enjoy!

Currently Reading: Einstein’s Dreams

Read:
The Memory of Water
Special Topics in Calamity Physics
T is for Trespass
Boy Meets Girl
Flight
Twilight
Eclipse
New Moon
Bitter is the New Black
Eat Pray Love
Why Men Marry Bitches
Magical Thinking
Minaret
The Other Boleyn Girl
Confederacy of Dunces- just figured out I had read this years ago…
Love in the Time of Cholera
Running with Scissors
Possible Side Effects
Dry
Masquerade
Devil in the White City
Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
Breaking Dawn
How to Be a Canadian
& Two other books I borrowed but forgot their names….

To Read:
The Book Theif
The Unbearable Lightness of Being
Unaccustomed Earth
Belong To Me
Love the One You’re With
A New Earth
Giving
Breakable You
Reading Lolitas of Tehran
The Monsters of Temptation
Now you See Him
Trauma
Then We Came to the End
Remembering Me
The King’s Gold

Honestly I really just felt the need to add a post….I’m sitting on my couch, wishing my sort throat wasn’t sore anymore and very tried. I need to go to sleep because tomorrow I’m suppose to help my two friends move in together. I’ve managed to punk out of 2 of their previous moves so I really need to do my part this time. Sigh. Really wish I felt better cause it’s the VMA’s this weekend and I should be out getting drunk w/ celebrities, but instead I worked then came home.

Last weekend I was able to go visit my BFF in Chicago and it was heaven. Her family is like my other family and I always just get to relax and chill out when I’m there. I leave all the problems in LA and just get to play with her 2 year old son and get fed lots of yummy food. Plus there’s the magic day bed. She had this bed in college and I used to sleep in her room during the day cause she got a breeze. now the bed is in the guest room and I always sleep like a baby in it. It’s amazing! I was having soo many problems with sleep before I left that I had tried several drugs and doctors. I’m trying to become more active, mostly cause I’m becoming a blob and I need to get physically exhausted as well as mentally.

Work isn’t stressing me out but my personal life is a bit. I feel stuck. Like I’m not moving anywhere. I never thought at this point in my life this is where I’d be but here I am and rather than except this shit I’m trying to fight it. I really have to find a new job soon and i’m trying to find a job which involves working with bands. I really want to combine TV, online, and music. I think it would be perfect for my new obsession with finding new music, the limitless possibilities of the Internet, and TV aspect is my fantastic ability to interview people. Never thought I ‘d be good at it but I am and now is the time to use this shit. I want a change…what I’d love is to get hired to be a band’s videographer and go on tour with them. I’d gladly put my shit in storage and take off for awhile. Sounds like a great adventure for me. I need a new adventure and one which doesn’t cost me thousands.

I’m also considering dating someone…yep that’s a new one for me. I’m not even sure I totally like this person or am just bored and am willing to take the chance. I haven’t totally decided yet and am hoping that next week we can just “run into” each other while out. Hey the one you want can’t get their shit together you have to go out and find someone new. I think I’m more than ready for this to happen…ok it’s taken a bit cause I haven’t found anyone I even remotely wanted to date but I might have now…….